photoshopped photo: Reza
by Julie Jigsawnovich
READER DISCRETION: L
Yesterday a teenage gangsta rapper friend in Tehran posted a general question for any friends to answer:
Reza: "Why do they become homosexual when there's a lot of girls?" :D
JJ: They are narcissistic sometimes. Or sometimes their grandma did something to them when they were little that freaked them out later. Or sometimes they were just born gay--and even if they try to get excited about females, they are still more excited by males. That's just what is natural for some people.
Reza: Yes, that's true outside of Iran! Because if you walk with your girlfriend in Iran, you will get caught by cops and get f*cked up! Or if that didn't happen, you will get caught by your parents (some parents are like that) and they will knock you out! So you will be scared that, "Oh, no more girlfriend." So you will go and have physical contact with boys, and you will think, "Oh yeah, I'm havin' contact with a girl." And suddenly you'll hear a sound like "But I have a d*ck, you dumb ass."
And I really hate it when two boys are kissing each other! (UGHH) wtf! I can even give them free non-haram girls so it won't be a sin anymore! Go and have fun with them!
JJ: Iran is so strict about dating, romance and sexuality that it actually drives young people into gay relationships. But gay people in Iran can be executed, which is terrible.
Can you explain to me the difference between haram and non-haram girls?
Reza: "Haram" means "not legal". But non-haram = Sighe movaghat [temporary marriage] =)) :)) [emoticons expressing laughter]--the thing that mullahs [clerics] are always doing! It's like a woman who lost her husband comes to mullah to ask for some help, saying, "Hello Mr. Haj, sir! I lost my husband, now I need some help. I have two orphan kids." And Haj agha [sir] will be like, "Ooowww that's grrrreaat! Inshallah [God willing] get ready for..."sighe" [temporary marriage]--and that's a big help for you."
Yesterday I saw a mullah in a taxi that had 40 sighe wives! WHAT???? 40??? I don't know how he can call them, like, "Hey my 27th sighe wife, come here for some hot non-haram f*ck."
And they will ruin the true Islam! And thats f*cked up! That's why many young people convert to other religions!
JJ: Aha, non-haram is temporary marriage! 40 sighe wives! They would need a bus! So maybe the mullahs like it when people are poor and desperate because it means cheap, easy sex for them?
Reza: Yeah, exactly! So they don't have to pay!
JJ: You mean so they don't have to pay a prostitute, or so they don't have to pay to support a regular wife?
Reza: In fact both of 'em! First of all, according to true Islam, "marrying or temporarily marrying a prostitute is haram." Mullahs do it now, but they have to pay money! So they don't wanna pay money, and they're looking for a woman whose husband is dead or left her! And also, they do not really support the woman! They just give them little foods and beat her child!
JJ: Beat the child to make the cleric seem like he is moral, even though he is not?
Reza: I don't know why they beats them! Last week I saw a mullah beat a 17year old girl in front of us, in the street! He punched the girl and said, "You don't have to call him again, I'm your stepfather!" And me and our friends went there and beat the mullah!
JJ: Wow! Was this in Tehran?
Reza: Yeah! We live in Tehran.
JJ: How did the girl react when you beat the mullah?
Reza: She said, "Thank you," and left!
JJ: Eyval!!!!!!!!!!! (You did a good thing.) You are a good man!
Reza: LOL (Laughing out loud)! Thanks!
JJ: Can you tell me more about the true Islam that they are ruining? Tell me more about how it is supposed to be?
Reza: Well, according to Dr.Shariati, the man who wanted to show the true Islam--but they killed him, he said that other religions such as Paganism and...that were in the past--in those religions it says you are what you are! God made you like that! If you don't know anything, if you're poor, it is what it is! But Islam (true version) is against this, and said you must have knowledge! You must have a great civilization. Work! Think! And also in "vaen yakad" a thing in Quran, it says that "Religion is not obligatory!" But now they're saying if you are not Shi'a, then you must die! But when Muhammad & twelve Imams came to show the people true Islam some guys who claimed they were Muslim, while in fact they were not--Like Muawiah, they start ruining it. And after that, some Iranian mullahs! In fact Islam is for the knowledge, is for the better life! But they are ruining it! Go and buy Dr. Shariati's "Religion against Religion" book, and read it! It's really great!
JJ: Wow! "Religion against Religion" sounds good! Who killed Dr. Shariati?
Reza: I don't know! Some years before the revolution, while Shariati was in London, some men rushed into his hotel and beat him, then killed him with oxygen injection! I think maybe it was mullahs' work because they were about to start the Revolution, and they didn't want people to know about true Islam. Or maybe British government sent them to kill him because they also didn't wanted people to know about true Islam!
JJ: I would like to publish this on http://jigsawnovich.blogspot.com. Do I have your permission?
Reza: LOL! Go on! Publish everything from me!